Starting a thread about my life with Cookie, while she’s in intensive care right now in San Francisco. She’s still conscious, but it’s not looking great. Even if she gets to come home I think it’s time to prepare to say goodbye to her.

1. This was the very first time I saw her.

I was 24 years old. I’d just moved to Petaling Jaya, Malaysia. With the first serious girlfriend I had. We thought it’d be a great idea to get a dog.

I took a pic of the moment I saw Cookie in Damansara Uptown

2. This was the day I brought her home, at 90 days old. I forgot the leash and put her in a cart instead to show her her new neighborhood.

She loved: squeezing under the gates and running into neighbors’ homes to eat all of their dogs’ and cats’ food.

We lived in this house next to Atria in PJ for these first two years of her life

3. I’d never had a dog before and I didn’t know many things. For the first couple of weeks I also had a water spout for her along with a bowl.

I praised her every time she used it.

So whenever she was naughty, she would run to the water spout and drink from it so I would praise her.

Cookie loved being told that she was a very good dog

4. One of the first things anyone told me about having Cookie was, that her nose was ‘white’ but would fill up and become blacker, then she would lose pigmentation in her nose as a senior.

That’s one of the things I’ve been observing about this face I’ve been looking at.

For a few years she had a cute black heart shaped nose, that had two heart shape ‘blanks’ on them. That’s who she was: a dog with hearts for everyone.

In recent photos you can see her nose is losing pigmentation

5. In Malaysia, her best friend was a cat called Gangster, who lived with us. Gangster passed on the same year we left Malaysia. Cookie never developed a close relationship with any other animal. She was bonded to him and they grew up together. Gangster was only 3 months younger than her, and was born in the house we lived (a stray cat came and decided she would have babies at our home. We kept all of them, including mum)

6. The hardest thing she’s ever done, other than perhaps actively dying right this moment: in 2012 I got extremely sick, broke up with my ex, quit my job(s), moved home (and Cookie). It wasn’t far (250 miles) but we still crossed a border. There was no plan other than to try to recover, with Cookie by my side.

She was in a quarantine for 4 months by herself. I visited as much as I could, but it was really hard. We’ve been through stuff together.

7. When it was finally time to leave the quarantine facility, she couldn’t believe it. We wound up having 6 wonderful years in Singapore where she was greatly loved by all.

Someone recently told me that if someone gets a Cavalier in Singapore now, people will say oh like Cookie?

My parents absolutely spoiled her and so did everyone she met there.

8. After 6 years in Singapore, we moved to San Francisco. I was aware that it was likely her final stop. She was 9 years old at that point.

One of the things I learned about having Cookie was: I will do anything for her.

I didn't want her to fly United (they'd just killed a dog that month) so we went the long way, through Helsinki.

I got to show her one of my favorite cities on the way to SF.

9. She took to her new home in California immediately.

Once we got here, a friend put us in his Airstream and drove us to wine country. What a perfect way to start our lives here.

She discovered her love for the outdoors (her life in the tropics previously was warm and full of love, and.. bugs)

Initially the hills were intense but she very quickly got used to them, running up and down hills with a lot of vigor all the time up until last week

10. In San Francisco, she loved walking. And walking. And running. She’s a city dog so she never loved dog runs or big hikes, but she loved the urban parks and nature we have here.

She especially loved the greenery on the Berkeley campus. It was full of squirrels she would pretend to chase (she never succeeded).

We went everywhere together.

11. 2009 (KL), 2016 (Singapore), 2024 (San Francisco).

When I went to pick out a puppy I almost went home with her sister. But my ex said ‘this puppy looks like she’s stubborn about picking you’ and I’m glad I listened to her.

I didn’t know what I was doing in life in 2009, but I knew all of it would have her in it, no matter how hard it was going to be.

12. We both got to live our best lives in California. I got to be a hiking camping cycling running REI lesbian.

She got to be in YouTube videos, tag along while I went birding, and she got to also salivate at delicious tacos.

In this video we went cycling to get bolo buns together. It was so fun! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7BRqpyroBQ

We even went on pancake hikes! (Hike Mt Tam, get pancakes at West Point Inn for charity)

13. We did most of our non-park walks in Japantown, Chinatown and Nob Hill. Up until she started having issues, she had a list of cafes and shops where she knew she could always count on a treat.

Even the places that didn’t have treats eventually broke down and went to get some for her. Because of her, I got to explore every part of the city.

(Good news, she was discharged from intensive care. She has a bit more time with us but she does have some pretty serious stuff going on with her. We will monitor to see how she’s doing. She lost a large amount of body mass from this episode but she has started to eat again. I’m thankful for whatever extra time we’ve got together.)

Sad to say, she passed this morning. Cookie lived a grand, amazing life. She brought me so much joy. I am so thankful for the last two months of extra time that she gave us.

All of these photos were taken in June 2024. She was happy and mobile and lucid, and she passed at home surrounded by people who love her. 14 years and 8 months of joy and happiness. She taught me so much. I will always love you Cookie

#DogsOfMastodon #Dogs

She lived almost 5 whole years past the average lifespan of a dog of her breed. Almost all of them develop heart diseases as puppies. We got so, so lucky that she didn’t have that at all, until literally 2 days before she left us. I’ll never have another Cavalier again (or another purebred dog), knowing what I know now about dogs.

In a way, it feels like a big chapter of my life has closed. She was with me between ages 24 and 39; through many countries and phases of life.

This morning, she got to eat whatever she wanted. Cat food, cat treats, cookies, butter pound cake. She was scrounging for (and receiving) snacks through to the end.

Life without her loud snores is going to sound way too quiet. Goodnight my sweet pea. I don’t think I would have learned how to love half as well if you hadn’t come into my life all those years ago.